Thursday, May 13, 2010

How Lost Will End

Okay, I have to admit it, I made this ending up. But for real this time....

Who's the mystery candidate - the guy Jacob sent Jack to spy on from the lighthouse. Wallace, right?

What's the secret of the island - a little cave full of a golden, glowing light that everybody wants, right?

A non-linear plot, lots of violence, heroin use, gangsters and hit men....

Yes, you figured it out. The final episode is going to be a 2-1/2 hour "safe for broadcast TV" version of Pulp Fiction. Watch out, Widmore - Marcellus Wallace (Again - Wallace from the lighthouse episode) wants that briefcase full of... golden, glowing light that everybody desires. And remember this:
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you."
Complete with role ambiguity:
But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. See, now I'm thinkin': maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. And I'd like that. But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd
(Just when you thought the producers were making this up as they went along.)

As for the attempted robbery:
Normally, both your asses would be dead as fucking fried chicken, but you happen to pull this shit while I'm in a transitional period so I don't wanna kill you, I wanna help you. But I can't give you this case, it don't belong to me. Besides, I've already been through too much shit this morning over this case to hand it over to your dumb ass.
Bad language or no, tell me that's wouldn't be an understandable response to a robbery attempt from somebody who just got off the island with a briefcase full of its magic light.

Hurley, of course, owns Big Kahuna Burger, a natural adjunct to the chicken business.

All questions answered. Sort of.


  1. I'm glad I'm not the only one who saw that light and said, "Marcelles (sp?)Wallace's soul!!!" They need to start smoking Red Apple cigarettes and we are good to go.

    PS: I used to wear Vamp nailpolish (on my toes though) like Uma did in that movie!

  2. When it comes to the contents of the briefcase I'm more of the "amazing but tangible contraband" school than of the "Marcellus sold his soul" school. The theory being that anything that Tarantino revealed inside the briefcase would be a let-down, so he left it to our imaginations. But I have to admit, the soul angle works better for the Lost tie-in.

    How about a song dedication for Jacob?


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.