Monday, February 16, 2009

Everything Old is New Again


With all of the recent variants on advance fee fraud (419 scams), particularly money order fraud, It's been a while since I got the classic "I'm the millionaire son of a tyrant who needs help figuring out how to FedEx a suitcase full of diamonds" version. But my wait is over:
FROM MR. ZUBI ADAM (VERY URGENT)

TEL: +27-784100444

EMAIL:zubiadam2@live.co.za

ATTENTION: SIR/MADAM,

You may be surprised to receive this message from me since you don't know me in person, but for the purpose of introduction, I am MR ZUBI ADAM, the son of late MR. THAMBA ADAM, who was murdered in a land dispute in ZIMBABWE. My late father was among the few black Zimbabwean rich farmers and a strong member of opposition party MDC (MOVEMENT DEOMCRATIC OF CHANGE) who is murdered in cold blood day by the agent of the ruling government of President ROBERT MUGABE for his alleged support and sympathy for Zimbabwean opposition party. Which we communicated to the whole world through BBC AND CNN.

Before the death of my father, he took me to SOUTH AFRICA to deposit the sum of EIGHTEEN MILLION US DOLLARS ($18M) with a security and finance company, as if he knew the looming danger in Zimbabwe . The money was deposited as a gem or precious stone to avoid much demurrage from the security firm. This money was earmarked for the purchase of new machinery and chemicals for the farms and the establishment of new farms in Lesotho and Swaziland .

This land problem arose when President ROBERT MUGABE introduced a new land Act. Which wholly affects the white rich farmers and some few blacks vehemently condemned the 'MODUS OPERANDI' adopted by the government. This resulted to rampant killing and mob actions. I and my family who are currently staying in South Africa as a refugee or an asylum seeker have decided to transfer this money to a foreign country where we can invest it. I am faced with the dilemma of investing this amount of money in South Africa for fear of encountering the same experience in future since both countries have the same political history.

I have meet and agreed after consulting financial expert who humbly advice us that the best way for realizing and safe guarding this fund without South Africa authority being after the money is to involve a foreigner.

Moreover, the South African monetary policy/law does not allow such investment hence I am seeking for an asylum or refugee. And the nature of your business does not necessary matter. So if you are willing to assist us, I and my family have agreed to give you 35% of the total money, 60% will be for a joint business venture I will be doing with you in your country and the remaining 5% will be mapped out for all expenses we may incurred during the transaction.

Therefore, if you are willing and interested to render the needed assistance, endeavor to reply through the above email address. Remember that this is highly confidential and the success of this business depends on how secret it is kept.

Expecting your reply soonest.

Best Regard.

ZUBI ADAM

(FOR THE FAMILY)
From its carefully personalized opening, "ATTENTION: SIR/MADAM", to its emotionally wrenching close, "(FOR THE FAMILY)", to the admission that the money (that doesn't actually exist) was stolen from a program "for the purchase of new machinery and chemicals for the farms and the establishment of new farms", I have to tell you... the proposal was hard to resist.

2 comments:

  1. I just got an email that said the exact same thing as yours. I laughed while I read it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Super. When you collect the $18million, can I borrow some? One of my kiddos is having brain surgery on Thursday and I want to buy him something nice. Thanks! :)

    ReplyDelete

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